Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I have complete contempt for fakery

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

Who are the K-Pop group members that you solo stan?

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

A Mud Volcano From the Ice Age Has Just Been Discovered—And It’s More Active Than We Thought - The Daily Galaxy

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

Whole-body movement play shows promise for children with autism - PsyPost

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

Appendix cancers on the rise in younger generations, study finds - NBC News

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I don’t cotton to rapists

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

'Are You Depressed Or Do You Just Need Some Chicken?' — 4 Things To Ask Yourself Before Spiraling - YourTango

I see through liars

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

What are some photos of female sexual organs?

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

Zika Virus Is Back After 6 Years in One of the Most Popular U.S. Tourist Destinations - AOL.com

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I don’t buy bullshit

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

Samsung Galaxy S26 Ultra to continue trend of disappointing batteries - PhoneArena

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

How can I handle my distrust and jealousy for my partner?

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I can count

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

Trump administration eyes stripping Columbia's accreditation - BBC

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I actually pay taxes

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I understand how hurricane paths work

I have a reading level above third grade

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I can read

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”